Starting over again

It's almost been a year since my last post.  I went out to Utah following that last post, and when I came back, Troy wanted to keep trying.  I said ok and put all my energy into that and everything else including my blog went to the way side.  Did it work?  No but I learned some important things along the way.  Do I regret trying, no.  To walk away from someone you love so deep you need to be sure that you have tried everything you can and I am slowly getting there.  It's hard to let go when you love so hard.  What did I learn... Anger is very damaging.. both to you and the one that you are angry with.  I regret that while we were trying to make this work that the anger over his love and attachment for another woman made it impossible for me to hear him from soft place.  What does that mean?  To really hear someone you have to have a soft heart.  It has to be open and and mine wasn't really, it was hard because of the hurt.  You learn alot about yourself when you go to therapy... some of it good, some of it not so good. I think in our case though therapy couldn't help because it is one person listening to two people tell two different stories of the same day and they both know they are right.... Some where in the middle is where the truth lies and it is just too hard to determine unless you know both people really well.  What she could tell was that Troy and do love each other but I am learning that there are so many levels of love and that love is just not enough sometimes....